Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Marriage


My mom and dad don't have any hobbies. This first time I thought about this was when my sister and I were trying to think of what to get them for Christmas. We thought, well what are their hobbies? What do they like to do in their spare time? And the thought came to us, well spend time with each other. After work, they go to the movies, dine out, watch tv all cuddled up on the couch or go out of town for the weekend. And as I thought about the fact that they are each others hobby, it made me wonder if this why they are still so in love after 28 years of marriage.

It's not that I think in order to have a successful marriage you can't have anything "for yourself". In fact I think it is vital to have things that you enjoy by yourself. But as I look around I don't see a plethora of happy couples, especially after 28 years and so I wonder if this is a part of their secret. Just the other day I called my mom and she told me that she and my dad had 20 minutes and realized they were in the same area of town so they met up at Fresh Market. As simple as it is, they walked around holding hands and sipping coffee and pretended like it was a little date. Hmm. After 28 years.

Last Saturday was their anniversary and out of all of the things to do, they came to visit me and take me out to lunch. I can't believe it. They said they didn't feel a pressure to do anything extravagant because they "date" each other all the time. My mom is constantly doing little things to help my dad and my dad regularly fills the flower vase in the kitchen. Each morning he brings her a cup of coffee and my mom will notice he needs something and gets it before he even knows it himself. On top of that, they are actually looking more and more youthful as the years pass. I believe being in love is their secret. They are truly best friends. They enjoy each others company. It's so very precious and rare.

I know a lot of couples who argue a lot and complain about each other. I always think of my parents. Sure they get frustrated at times, they are not perfect. But really factors outside of their relationship are the cause of tension, never each other. There is something to this. And because I believe in what they have to be from God, so fresh after so many years, I am thankful for the example.

2 comments:

East Carolina In My Mind said...

Awh so sweet! 28 years...that is awesome! Please tell your parents hello for me:)

Kels said...

Reading this means a whole lot to me. I never thought about your parents being each others "hobbies," but it makes a lot of sense. When I started to think about it, mine are the same way, and I think that's what makes them so unique. That's what I want for B and I and what I want for you and your hubby one day! Who cares if you can do all of this great stuff and don't know your spouse, right?